Japanglish Fantasy League Vocabulary #5

Japanese Dinosaur - n. 1). A Japanese woman who holds her handbag like the mighty Tyrant Lizard:

(I couldn't find a good picture, but this should give you the general idea)

2). The 45-year-old woman you picked up at Pure¹ last night.

See Also: Velociraptor, Louis Vuitton

1Pure - n. 1). An infamous foreigner pick-up nightclub.
2). A wretched hive of villany and English teachers.

The Most Important Meal of the Day

I love me some Japanese food something fierce. It's one of the main reasons I came back (which seems like a really horrible reason, until you imagine having a craving for a tuna onigiri for two damn years). Sure, there are a few inedible things like umeboshi or natto, but in general, shit be delicious. The main exception to this rule of deliciousness is breakfast. The traditional Japanese breakfast is essentially the worst parts of lunch and dinner, with miso and rice.

Meanwhile in America Damn It, we got waffles, pancakes, sausages, bacon, omelets, biscuits, cereal, and occasionally, fresh fruit. And that's just a SINGLE DISH at Denny's. We haven't even gotten into such variations as the chocolate chip pancake or the biscuit sandwich. American breakfast is so freaking sweet, I will sometimes eat it three times a day. It is not a meal. It is an institution.